So my cat had diarrhea and while treating the diarrhea he became constipated and thank god I work for a rescue because this could have been a much more expensive affair otherwise. Here’s to Scruffy who successfully pooped this morning and narrowly avoided an enema, and here’s to Halifax Cat Rescue Society, please send them money.

Away we go back in time today to October 4th while mister poopsalot was still pooping a lot and not refusing to poop.

Jonathan writes in his diary in the morning and tells about how Mina woke him in the middle of the night and told him to fetch Van Helsing. She wants to be hypnotized before the sun comes up. Jonathan does his wife’s bidding and explains it to Dr. Lobotomy who was on watch in the hall, who goes to get him. Everybody goes to the Harker room in their PJs and

When you’re writing a novel, you should be thinking a lot about structure and placement of events so that the right thing goes wrong at the right time for the sake of drama or dissemination of information or whatever. I think back on the chapters where Jonathan and Renfield occupied a chronological parallel and I thought it was genius. Now I kinda wonder if it was an accident or, the more likely scenario, Stoker has been writing this book for a while and he’s getting kinda mentally tired, or even bored. This is why you do editing rounds, to go back over and rearrange these things, so when Mina suddenly wants to get hypnotized, it feels a bit like it came out of nowhere. Yes they’ve discussed hypnotism before but why are they just remembering and doing it now? I guess I have to read more to find out.

Everybody goes to the Harker room in their PJs and Mina asks to be hypnotized by Van Helsing, while it’s still dark so she can speak freely. Isn’t it that she can only fall prey to Dracula’s compulsions when he’s around, which would inherently have to be at night? Whatever.

Van Helsing does some jazz fingers to hypnotize her. He asks her where she is, but she can’t see anything. She can hear water. She’s on a boat that is lifting its anchor. Mina wakes up as the sun has risen, and the team has a clue. Van Helsing believes that Dracula grabbed his money when he was facing Jonathan because he needed it to flee the country, so he’s taking off with his final box of dirt, fleeing like prey.

Tally Ho! as friend Arthur would say when he put on his red frock! Our old fox is wily; oh! so wily, and we must follow with wile. I, too, am wily and I think his mind in a little while.

He always says stuff like this and it’s very funny to me, because I imagine that Arthur has never said any of the things that Van Helsing pretends that he says. Van Helsing doesn’t do this to anyone else either, he’s just in love with Arthur and the idea of Arthur he has in his head. I also like to imagine he just doesn’t know what Americans say so he doesn’t include Quincey, he just knows British hunting phrases.

Van Helsing says that they can chill till nightfall and resume their chase. When Mina questions why they’re going after a man who has already fled, Van Helsing is elusive again. After breakfast she asks again and Van Helsing is frank: to save her, they can’t let him get away.


Ooh, a special edition.

Van Helsing tells Jonathan to stay with Mina while he and the polycule hunt Dracula home to his castle in Transylvania. RIP to whatever poor bitches are on the boat going the Demeter route in reverse.

He says a bunch of heartening stuff about how it took Dracula hundreds of years to get to London, and about how he’ll be swept out in a day. Van Helsing addresses Jonathan as “dear husband of Madam Mina,” and signs off.

Why not just say it to their faces? Or even write a letter if you want the epistolary thing to keep up? Oh well I guess.

Jonathan journals again and records how relieved he and Mina both are to know that Dracula is gone. They pore over all their documents anyway, too anxious to be still. Jonathan realizes that he and Mina haven’t talked about the future at all.

The day is running by more quickly than I ever thought a day could run for me again. It is now three o’clock.

Time is so slow when traumatic things are happening.

I am disappointed that Jonathan and Dracula aren’t going to have a cool showdown. This is what I would want to happen to a real person, not a fictional character. I want the rape revenge fantasy where Jonathan takes out the guy whose shadow will follow him for the rest of his life.


October 6th, we might as well do both of these days as they’re reasonably sized.

In the middle of the night Mina sends Jonathan to get Van Helsing. 

I assumed that if he was leaving a letter for them like he did that they’d be gone already but I GUESS NOT. (Seems kinda weird in the sense of novel structure but maybe this isn’t the order that we actually see these journals?)

Mina tells Van Helsing that she has to go to Transylvania with them, for her own safety as well as theirs. If Dracula compels her to follow, she will have to go anyway, even if it means slithering away from Jonathan and giving him the slip, so she might as well do it in their charge. They can also hypnotize her for info on Dracula. Van Helsing is swayed. I’m thrilled to get my rape revenge face-off after all.

Mina falls asleep and Van Helsing calls her harem in for a meeting. They are embarking to Varna, Bulgaria, in the morning and will now be going with Mina. The plan is to get there ahead of the boat and get to the box. If they put a wild rose on it, Dracula will be stuck within until they get a private moment to do the deed. Quincey, my love, says he’ll bust Dracula up as soon as he gets to the box, no matter how many people see. Spoken like a true USian. 

I grasped his hand instinctively and found it as firm as a piece of steel. I think he understood my look; I hope he did.

“Good boy,” said Dr. Van Helsing. “Brave boy. Quincey is all man. God bless him for it. 

Woman rolls her eyes back in excitement and the image glitches and smears

Ooh Van Helsing praising Quincey like a dog really does it for me.

Van Helsing tells everyone he’ll go buy the travel tickets while everyone else gets their affairs in order in case the worst happens, and they do.

Later, Jonathan takes note of how every sunrise and sunset is a harrowing experience for them now. He suspects that Mina has something to tell him and signs off for the day saying simply “She is calling to me.” which is kinda fun and foreboding.

Okay look at me finally catching up on Dracula. There’s one entry for October 11th that I’ll try to do tomorrow and then we’ll be on track. Thank you all for your patience!

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